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13 Signs She's A Loser (11/17)

Baby, I'm Yours: She wants to have kids so she can stop working and mooch off you. Now who's the child?
She Needs To Do Everything With You: It's one thing to share experiences, but it's another thing to need someone to hold your hand all the time. When it goes beyond wanting to spending time together to demanding it constantly, you have to wonder, what's her problem?
Party Pooper: She's mopey when you're not giving her 100 percent of your attention. When you start having fun, she's wants to leave.
Sex As A Weapon: Putting out is the bartering chip she's been using since her school days, but it's a cheap ploy. A clever woman who respects herself doesn't have to abuse her sexual power.
Dirty-Flirty Double Standard: She flirts with dudes in front of you, shamelessly. Then, she gets super mad and makes a scene if you so much as give a cute waitress your order.
High-Maintenance Mama: She's constantly complaining and barking orders. Everyone around her rolls their eyes at her demands. Why doesn't she get off her duff and do it herself?
Friend Indeed: She forces you to show off to her lady friends with grand displays of obedience, love, and virility. But she never wants to hang out with you and your best bros. Why is it she expects people to thinks she's impressive when she never does anything to impress them?
Parent Trap: She blames her life's problems on her parents, yet she depends on them, a lot.
Social Climber: She's always looking for someone richer to kiss up to. When it comes to making new friends, she's a total snob.
Beauty Is Only Skin Deep: She thinks she should be famous, but she hasn't done anything to warrant admiration besides look pretty.
Eau De Desperation: She reeks of needing a man, and she will stop at nothing to bag one. When she's single, her female friends even feel like they have to hide their boyfriends for fear she will try to pounce.
One-Way Street: You're constantly doing things for her, but, as Janet Jackson would put it, "What have you done for me lately?" If she's going to act like a princess, why doesn't she treat you like the prince of a gentleman you are?
Go Fish: She's always looking for compliments. You have to constantly reassure her that she's amazing, but her response always seems to say: "I know."

May

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		I-90/I-94 KENNEDY EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 1 (Moderate) I-90/I-94 Kennedy Exwy OUTBOUND from I-290 Eisenhower Exwy to I-94 Edens Exwy

		I-90/I-94 KENNEDY EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 1 (Moderate) I-90/I-94 Kennedy Exwy OUTBOUND from I-290 Eisenhower Exwy to I-294 Tri-State Tollway

		I-94 EDENS EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 0 () I-94 Edens Exwy INBOUND from IL-58/Dempster St (#37) to I-90 Kennedy Exwy

		I-94 EDENS EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 0 () I-94 Edens Exwy INBOUND from I-94/I-294 Tri-State Tollway to I-90 Kennedy Exwy

		I-94 EDENS EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 0 () I-94 Edens Exwy INBOUND from I-94 Edens Exwy to IL-58/Dempster St (#37)

		I-90/I-94 KENNEDY EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 0 () I-90/I-94 Kennedy Exwy INBOUND from I-294 Tri-State Tollway to I-94 Edens Exwy

		I-90/I-94 KENNEDY EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 0 () I-90/I-94 Kennedy Exwy INBOUND from I-294 Tri-State Tollway to I-290 Eisenhower Exwy

		I-90/I-94 KENNEDY EXPRESS LANES OUTBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 0 () I-90/I-94 Kennedy Express Lanes Outbound from Ohio St/Ontario St Feeder to I-94 Edens Exwy

		I-90/I-94 DAN RYAN EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 0 () I-90/I-94 Dan Ryan Exwy INBOUND from I-55 Stevenson Exwy to I-290 Eisenhower Exwy

		I-290 EISENHOWER EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 0 () I-290 Eisenhower Exwy OUTBOUND from I-90/I-94 Kennedy Exwy/Dan Ryan Exwy to Wolf Rd (#16)

		I-290 EISENHOWER EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 8 - Incidents 0 () I-290 Eisenhower Exwy INBOUND from Wolf Rd (#16) to I-90/I-94 Kennedy Exwy/Dan Ryan Exwy

		I-90/I-94 DAN RYAN EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 7 - Incidents 1 (Moderate) I-90/I-94 Dan Ryan Exwy INBOUND from I-57/Bishop Ford Frwy to I-290 Eisenhower Exwy

		I-94/I-294 TRI-STATE TOLLWAY SOUTHBOUND Jam Factor 7 - Incidents 0 () I-94/I-294 Tri-State Tollway SOUTHBOUND from Lake-Cook Rd to I-90 Jane Addams Tollway

		I-90/I-94 KENNEDY EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 7 - Incidents 0 () I-90/I-94 Kennedy Exwy INBOUND from I-94 Edens Exwy to I-290 Eisenhower Exwy

		I-90/I-94 KENNEDY EXPRESS LANES INBOUND Jam Factor 7 - Incidents 0 () I-90/I-94 Kennedy Express Lanes Inbound from I-94 Edens Exwy to Ohio St/Ontario St Feeder

		I-55 STEVENSON EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 7 - Incidents 0 () I-55 Stevenson Exwy OUTBOUND from US-41 Lake Shore Dr to I-294 Tri-State Tollway

		I-290 EISENHOWER EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 7 - Incidents 0 () I-290 Eisenhower Exwy OUTBOUND from Congress Pkwy to IL-53

		I-290 EISENHOWER EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 7 - Incidents 0 () I-290 Eisenhower Exwy INBOUND from IL-53 to Congress Pkwy

		I-90/I-94 DAN RYAN EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 6 - Incidents 1 (Moderate) I-90/I-94 Dan Ryan Exwy OUTBOUND from I-90 Chicago Skyway to I-57/Bishop Ford Frwy

		I-94/I-294 TRI-STATE TOLLWAY SOUTHBOUND Jam Factor 6 - Incidents 0 () I-94/I-294 Tri-State Tollway SOUTHBOUND from I-90 Jane Addams Tollway to I-55 Stevenson Exwy

		I-90/I-94 KENNEDY EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 6 - Incidents 0 () I-90/I-94 Kennedy Exwy OUTBOUND from I-94 Edens Exwy to I-294 Tri-State Tollway

		I-290 EISENHOWER EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 6 - Incidents 0 () I-290 Eisenhower Exwy INBOUND from I-355 North-South Tollway (#7) to Wolf Rd (#16)

		I-90/I-94 DAN RYAN EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 5 - Incidents 1 (Moderate) I-90/I-94 Dan Ryan Exwy OUTBOUND from I-290 Eisenhower Exwy to I-57/Bishop Ford Frwy

		LAKE SHORE DRIVE NORTHBOUND Jam Factor 5 - Incidents 0 () Lake Shore Drive NORTHBOUND from Hayes Dr to Balbo Dr

		I-55 STEVENSON EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 5 - Incidents 0 () I-55 Stevenson Exwy OUTBOUND from US-41 Lake Shore Dr to I-80 (#250)

		I-55 STEVENSON EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 5 - Incidents 0 () I-55 Stevenson Exwy INBOUND from I-355 North-South Tollway to I-294 Tri-State Tollway

		I-55 STEVENSON EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 5 - Incidents 0 () I-55 Stevenson Exwy INBOUND from I-294 Tri-State Tollway to US-41 Lake Shore Dr

		I-190 O'HARE ACCESS EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 5 - Incidents 0 () I-190 O'Hare Access Exwy INBOUND from O'Hare Airport to I-90 Kennedy Exwy

		IL-53 NORTHBOUND Jam Factor 4 - Incidents 1 (Moderate) IL-53 NORTHBOUND from I-290 Eisenhower Exwy to Lake-Cook Rd

		I-94/I-294 TRI-STATE TOLLWAY SOUTHBOUND Jam Factor 4 - Incidents 1 (Moderate) I-94/I-294 Tri-State Tollway SOUTHBOUND from Wisconsin State Line to I-94 Bishop Ford Frwy/Kingery Exwy

		I-90/I-94 DAN RYAN EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 4 - Incidents 0 () I-90/I-94 Dan Ryan Exwy OUTBOUND from Local/Express Split-Merge (North) to Local/Express Split-Merge (South)

		I-90 JANE ADDAMS TOLLWAY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 4 - Incidents 0 () I-90 Jane Addams Tollway OUTBOUND from Boone/Mchenry County Line to I-39 (NP)

		I-55 STEVENSON EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 4 - Incidents 0 () I-55 Stevenson Exwy INBOUND from I-80 (#250) to US-41 Lake Shore Dr

		LAKE SHORE DRIVE NORTHBOUND Jam Factor 3 - Incidents 0 () Lake Shore Drive NORTHBOUND from Hayes Dr to Bryn Mawr Av

		I-90/I-94 DAN RYAN EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 3 - Incidents 0 () I-90/I-94 Dan Ryan Exwy OUTBOUND from I-290 Eisenhower Exwy to I-55 Stevenson Exwy

		I-90 JANE ADDAMS TOLLWAY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 3 - Incidents 0 () I-90 Jane Addams Tollway OUTBOUND from IL-31 to Mchenry/Boone County Line

		LAKE SHORE DRIVE SOUTHBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 1 (Severe) Lake Shore Drive SOUTHBOUND from Bryn Mawr Av to Balbo Dr

		I-94 OUTBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 1 (Moderate) I-94 Outbound from I-290 Eisenhower Exwy to I-94 Bishop Ford Frwy/Kingery Exwy

		I-94 EDENS EXWY EASTBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-94 Edens Exwy EASTBOUND from I-94/I-294 Tri-State Tollway to I-94 Edens Exwy

		I-94 BISHOP FORD FRWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-94 Bishop Ford Frwy OUTBOUND from I-57/Dan Ryan Exwy to I-80/I-294/IL-394 Kingery Exwy/Tri-State Tollway

		I-90/I-94 DAN RYAN EXWY INBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-90/I-94 Dan Ryan Exwy INBOUND from Local/Express Split-Merge (South) to Local/Express Split-Merge (North)

		I-90 JANE ADDAMS TOLLWAY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-90 Jane Addams Tollway OUTBOUND from I-294 Tri-State Tollway to Mchenry/Boone County Line

		I-90 JANE ADDAMS TOLLWAY INBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-90 Jane Addams Tollway INBOUND from Mchenry/Boone County Line to IL-31

		I-90 JANE ADDAMS TOLLWAY INBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-90 Jane Addams Tollway INBOUND from Mchenry/Boone County Line to I-294 Tri-State Tollway

		I-90 JANE ADDAMS TOLLWAY INBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-90 Jane Addams Tollway INBOUND from IL-31 to I-294 Tri-State Tollway

		I-80/I-94 KINGERY EXWY EASTBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-80/I-94 Kingery Exwy EASTBOUND from I-294 Tri-State Tollway/I-94 Bishop Ford Frwy/IL-394 to Illinois State Line

		I-55 STEVENSON EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-55 Stevenson Exwy OUTBOUND from I-294 Tri-State Tollway to I-355 North-South Tollway

		I-290 EISENHOWER EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-290 Eisenhower Exwy OUTBOUND from Wolf Rd (#16) to I-355 North-South Tollway (#7)

		I-190 O'HARE ACCESS EXWY OUTBOUND Jam Factor 2 - Incidents 0 () I-190 O'Hare Access Exwy OUTBOUND from I-90 Kennedy Exwy to O'Hare Airport

		LAKE SHORE DRIVE SOUTHBOUND Jam Factor 1 - Incidents 1 (Severe) Lake Shore Drive SOUTHBOUND from Bryn Mawr Av to Hayes Dr

Today	Hi: 52 Lo: 52	Showers Likely
Friday	Hi: 57 Lo: 49	Showers Likely
Saturday	Hi: 58 Lo: 47	Breezy
Sunday	Hi: 58 Lo: 50	Sunny
Monday	Hi: 64 Lo: 52	Partly Cloudy